I took a long break last summer, and I promised to follow-up on what happened with my experiment. My last blog, which was too long ago, shared a personal decision to take 9 weeks off in the summer of 2022. I shared that without a break, I risked my own health (sleeping, eating mindfully, managing stress, and exercising). I also felt I was missing that vital time to reflect, plan, contemplate my life and business – things like the next phase of my business, and how I wanted to focus the next years of my business.
During my time off, I asked myself some questions: What would make me feel more complete and happier at this point of my life (now 55+ years old)? What does “retirement” look like for me? I had shared my caregiver journey with husband Steve, and for the first time, I openly declared my status as a caregiver for my husband, a 100%-rated disabled veteran. I realized most of my clients didn’t even know about Steve’s status, and they were shocked. Perhaps I was covering this aspect of my life up so that my clients always felt #1. Now everyone knows they are not. My family and my well-being are more important. I now talk openly about it all the time, so that I can be transparent and humanize the relationship with my clients.
I learned on my own how to do a long break (a sabbatical, long vacation, whatever you may call it). I want to share some advice and insights if you’re ever thinking that it’s time to take a long, intentional break from work.
- Start communicating to friends, colleagues, and clients early (a year in advance if possible). The more you say it and circulate it, it will become real, and you will have supporters as you get close to taking the time off. Talk to and gain agreement from your spouse or whomever you share a household with and discuss expenses. How will it will work financially.
- Plan some things you hope to do, but don’t plan too much. I made my “sabbatical list” way too long, and I had to cut it down. I started to get overwhelmed (just like work!) trying to do too much at the start of the sabbatical. I received some coaching during the first few weeks, and I realized I was over planning it. Save some open days with no agenda or plans. Decide how much alone time vs. time with others you want. A balance is best in my experience.
- It’s your time off, so you don’t have to plan an elaborate trip for it to be a rich experience. I enjoyed time in my garden, taking short road trips with my mom and family, going to the beach, hiking with my daughter, getting spa treatments, and eating out on my patio alone or with friends. Don’t let others make you feel you’re not doing enough just because you are off. The whole point is that doing little and simple can be good, desired, and needed.
- Manage family and home expectations. One thing I hadn’t planned on is my family’s expectations and maintaining the regular home responsibilities. For me, that included caretaking, and the usual cleaning, laundry, and chores etc. It all became ever present and felt like a letdown in the first few weeks of my sabbatical. Unless you completely go away for the entire sabbatical without your family – you’ll still have these things to tend to. It may feel like the chores are even more intense at times! How did I have time to do this stuff when I was working? I wish I would have planned better for help with caretaking and cut down my wish-list of home projects. I just didn’t have time to do all I wanted, so I had to abandon some plans. I realized how much time caretaking and home chores was really taking, and since I returned to work, I now have more help at home – hired caretaking and more housekeeping.
- Finally, realize that by taking a break, you are becoming stronger. I feel stronger and more assertive than ever, setting healthy boundaries and giving myself permission to say NO, or NOT NOW. I do it more now and feel less guilt, more power.
You might be thinking how can I do this? Most companies do not offer an accommodation for sabbaticals. Here are some ways you can create your own personal break in your career:
- Use your leave. Many professionals don’t use time that is already a benefit. Take a 3–4-week vacation at once. Plan for this 6-months in advance. If you don’t have that much paid time off, combine vacation with unpaid leave. Ask for it.
- Quit. Sounds severe, but you can just stop working for a while and come back into the workforce. Of course, you must be in a financial situation to do this. Again, plan at least a year in advance for this and review finances with your family.
- Take a less strenuous, work from home, or part time job for a year. This can allow for some continuous income while you reduce your responsibilities, hectic schedule, and stress level. Being able to work 40 hours or less can be just the break you need. This can also be a great pre-retirement plan.
I am taking another long break this summer. This time not quite as long, because I have some amazing new clients that I am enjoying, but I’ll take at least 6 weeks off. These longer breaks are now my permanent strategy to extend my working life by protecting my well-being and health so I can serve my clients longer. I hope more professional women (and men or any caregiver) will join me in the revolution. Why retire when you love your work? Stretch it out by taking a sabbatical – or two or three!
Join Center for Nonprofit Excellence (www.thecne.org) for a panel discussion on sabbaticals on May 17, 2023. Free and open to all.
